Monday, April 18, 2011

So, who put the crap back in Hewlett-Crappard/Comcrap?

Our story continues... oh, you wouldn't expect anything less, would you?

HewlettCrappard/Comcrap so graciously agreed to take back my craptop (again) and repair it. Seeing as it hasn't worked correctly from day one, it seems like a reasonable thing for them to do. If you don't know the whole story by now, just scroll down my blog a few entries.

But you know what's going to happen now, don't you?

I sent in my laptop once more, since when they "fixed" both the first and second (or is it twelfth) time previously, it didn't work. The first time it was 'repaired', it worked for 12 days and then collapsed once more.

So, good people that they are, they sent me another Fed-Ex overnight shipping box, to return it to them, so they could fix it right away. Two weeks later, with no sign of contact from the mother ship, I received a cryptic voice message from home. It was from an Indian sounding woman (and unfortunately we deleted it as I so wanted you to hear the audio) and she said,

"This is *&%$^&(*& from Hewlett/Crap*&%$^&(*& and we are trying to *&%$^&(*& your *&%$^&(*& craptop. We are sorry *&%$^&(*& but we can't *&%$^&(*& it. We *&%$^&(*& to tell you that *&%$^&(*&. Once again, we *&%$^&(*& sorry. Good *&%$^&(*&."

I believe she was calling from the underground headquarters of HP with a Tracfone on it's last minutes.

As I hadn't had any contact with the company via email for nearly two weeks, I thought my craptop was gone for good. But, as my Mother used to say, "Oh, ye of little faith." I received an email from the Crappards, and my laptop was to be delivered Monday (today!). Another miracle!

We all got home after a lovely day. I was beyond excited (hey, it doesn't take much lately). We got it open. I lifted the lid, pushed the power button and... it didn't work!

Shocking, I know. I was really surprised because... okay, i wasn't surprised. So, I dialed the 800 number, which I now have memorized as I know both the area code and country code for India and Pakistan.

This time I got Latasha on the phone. I think I also heard Boris Badenov in the background too, but I digress. The last several times on the phone, I spoke with Micah, Malcolm and Mudhoo so I'm moving up in the HP world to the L's.

I told her my story, which I've now repeated to 67% of the crack HewlettCrappard repair staff previously and she apologized profusely. She said she would do everything she could to help. I told her I appreciated that. She commented on how calm I was being. I told her that the day was young and she laughed.

Anyway, to make a long story longer, she said that she was going to Fed-Ex me another box (I have a big collection in the recycle bin if you need any) and they would attempt to fix it once more. She also said, which I really loved and almost made it all worth it, "I will put a note on this laptop saying to make sure they check to see if it works before they send it back to you."

"Really? Really???", I told her, "You really have to put a note on it? Wouldn't you think they might check it BEFORE they sent it back to me?"

She laughed but unfortunately, she was serious. I told her to please write the note as just maybe it would help. I then asked how many more times I had to return it in before they gave me a new one. She said that three times was the limit. If it didn't work (we both laughed really hard then!), I would either get a new one, get my money back (ha!) or be allowed to whack three HP executives of my choice on the head with my broken craptop. Okay, I made the last one up but I'd take that opportunity if presented to me.

So, now I sit and wait for another lovely Fed-Ex overnight box.

It keeps life interesting around the Henry household. Thomas can't understand how they can continue to keep sending back broken laptops to me and I keep telling him you just have to fight for what's right.

It's a life lesson. I'm not sure exactly what that life lesson is but I'm sticking around to find out.